So it definitely looks like there are major issues using these Realtek 8157 based USB dongles with NFS.
I have been running the exact same configuration, but with OWC 10 GbE TB3 adapters, and the systems are rock stable.
The performance is a a bit better (10 GbE versus 5 GbE), but the price is wildly higher.
However, it looks like the only stable upgrade option from 2.5 GbE is to go to the older, more stable, 10 GbE TB3 solution.
A simple low-cost USB-powered set of fans is a good idea, as these TB3 devices tend to get a bit hot.
There are a bunch of OWC 10 GbE open-box units available, since a bunch of people end up returning these.
At about $145 each (10 GbE OWC open-box), compared to the $35 each (WisdPi 5 GbE), they are about 4 times the cost.
But a lower cost solution that causes multiple nodes in a Proxmox cluster to randomly lock-up and hang isn't much of a solution!