So I went with a Supermicro AOC-S25G-B2S for my small home Proxmox cluster based on the STH review for 25Gb cards and well... I should have gone with my gut and stuck with the AOC-S25G-I2S for the Intel version because Proxmox doesn't like the card. I'm working on a reboot and will post some logs but it's something to do with the RoCE and Infiniband support causes a kernel panic that leaves the system operational but the card in a unregistering the nics state.